I am not a home

In my life, I have never been a home to anyone

I have been a door,

standing firmly,

staring at people hopefully, yet helplessly

letting them come arduously and go freely.

In the eyes of outsiders, I am the epitome of strength and pride

who debars anyone and everyone to come inside

without satisfying me with a cause,

without climbing my stairs of criteria.

And insiders nickname me as weak and possessive

because I cling to them as a hinge

without displaying my dignity,

without illustrating my independence.

Some days it rains, it rains heavily.

Imbibition makes me swell with self worth,

And I get chocked enough to be opened anymore

Somedays a thin ray of sunlight peeps through me

Compelling me to be parched in acceptance,

discovering the darkness inside.

My knob is in the shape of a fist.

Robbers try to play with it, toil to break it.

But the destiny teaches only to few real people

how to unlock it,

keeping it unbroken and shining as before

My frame is in the shape of your mindset

And my conscience has concluded that

I don’t need to fit in every frame

to look beautiful,

to feel valued.

Still, sometimes I wonder

“What’s the existence of a home without a door and why the existence of a door is so unvalued!”

©ruchiabhisikta

6 thoughts on “I am not a home

  1. Good day,
    Ruchiabhisikta

    Just as they report, real life is.

    My answer:

    Nobody can be a home
    the other

    unless I carry others
    intentionally or unintentionally
    in myself

    or, I’ll open the door
    for someone in my heart

    many stare and see each other
    in someone else’s mirror
    the true self
    the bad or the good

    the excessive
    or that what they dignified
    disregard someone else

    everyone makes his judgment
    from his thoughts
    whether they are real
    correspond to truth
    that’s another matter

    we all mean ourselves
    for the time being
    the measure of all things
    and who does not correspond to it
    his touches are like
    poison and fire

    the one soul
    keeps all doors open for us
    and who with us in our
    Heart wants to bed
    we can do that
    Let lie next to us in bed

    when a person does not correspond to us
    part with him and leave him

    what others say of us
    what they give us
    mean by their judgment

    the darkness inside me
    the dream opens up to me
    the new insight for myself
    my own life

    the conscience
    holds a guideline
    for a possible gait
    to live
    to myself
    to others firmly

    I have to become aware of myself
    what for me for the better
    myself and others
    is important to me for every act

    dignity is common to all people
    the bad and the good

    I have no questions
    to me
    to put to others
    I try myself
    on everything
    to give an answer

    I don’t have to
    someone of importance
    strong, influential
    I want to be that
    who I really am

    Best regards
    Hans Gamma

    Liked by 1 person

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