While taking a selfie,
I’m not so good at tilting my head in a perfect angle. I’m too bad at drawing a perfect smile on my face.
But each time I take a selfie,
I gaze at me so close, so fixed
I observe how peacefully hollowness slumbers in my eyes.
I see how my eyebrows have become wayward as if there is none to guide them.
I feel how my nose breathes imperfection so perfectly.
I notice how my chapped lips are tenacious enough not to vent out the volume of my heart in front of everyone.
I touch the pimple on my cheek to know if that full stop is going to fade away nearly or continue as an ellipsis.
I run my fingers on the alleys of my parted hairs and shivers with the thought what if oneday like this parted hairstyle the people I love so much will go in their own ways to never cross my path again.
Reading my face this way made me realize why I can’t fit into anyone’s definition of beauty. I realize how hard I am to be loved by someone.
And before clicking the selfie, I smile a little cornered thinking how this Abhisikta reigns her own little realm happily
with the flaws she possesses
with the elegance, she lacks…
*Abhisikta is a Sanskrit word that means enthroned girl👸